Life is all about the messy bits

I find myself reflecting on life’s shortcomings. Many people, like me, have a dream of a perfect family relationship, excellent work, and a great church environment. Ideals that are only living in the mind of a dreamer. Life, on the other hand, is a series of ups and downs.

It took me a long time to realize that it would never be a consistent as I wanted. I can thank my husband for pointing it out many times before I accepted. I am a fixer. I like situations to work out for the best. Not being able to reach a mutual understanding caused me a lot of anxiety.

I can talk things through, expose my reasons and accept defeat when proven wrong. That’s not the case for other people. As a Real Estate Agent, I have learned to prove my points by showing my clients proof of my assessments and recommendations. I want not only to tell people what but also why.

Relationships are a lot of work and will not grow unless everyone makes an effort. I’m growing older, and lately, I have given up on having perfect relationships. It is what it is; life is full of conflicts you can’t solve. The messy bits in between the good times add flavor to an otherwise stagnant and boring life.

The messy bits also allow you to learn about yourself and grow in knowledge and lots of patience. I have learned so much about myself in the last few years, just letting the dark times of life be what they are: a time to reflect on the reasons behind the situations and accepting that some will never be better. We all see things in different lights; let others’ light shine through as well.

Our dreams are not everyone’s dreams, and finally, to each their own. Oh, how liberating it is to allow everyone to do as they want, need, or desire just because they are entitled to do as they feel. Letting them go through the process will allow them to better prepare for life.

You can’t help everyone, and some will not let you anyway, no matter how much experience you have. I have learned to embrace the messy bits and wait patiently for the glorious light that comes after the teaching moments.

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