Letter to the child that lives in me

“Don’t stay down for too long, get up and conquer”

Corazón Samaritano


It has been a while since we talked but I have not forgotten about you. Life is so busy these days, you know. I do not have time to play like you used to, but I often remember those days we spent together.

      In my memory the little girl has a special place. She has never been a way for a long of time. The stripe polo shirt, the shorts, and long socks almost to her knees is the image that I cannot seem to erase. Short hair, bangs decorating the forehead. Why is this image so vivid in my memory? I try to dig deep in the memory bank, but I cannot seem to locate the missing file.

I still ask lots of questions even when I know the answers to may of them. It helps me to be accurate and not arrogant. I know you had a hard time with that. You were not trying to sound disrespectful, it was your eagerness to participate in the conversation. They could not understand you and you were too young to tame yourself. It is okay. It paid dividends at the end.

You were so little, pure hearted, full of hope, dreams, and desires. Smart girl, always wanting to learn about life, politics, religion, arts, and crafts. I remember you did not have the same interest for cooking or cleaning the house. Those were mere tasks that do not feed the heart, too easy to accomplish and nothing more than that. Do not worry, I am a great cook. I learned to wash and iron clothes. It came to me amazingly fast. I am still a fast learner just like you were through all your school years. It is a great advantage, that skill stayed with me through life. Do you know that I also learned a lot about politics and religion, and now dabble in the arts? Of course, you know, because we are still close at heart.

    I have many different memories of you around that time and age. Some are happy memories of you running around in the farm. Getting attacked by ants while crossing the neighbor’s fence or falling on a cow drop playing tap. I wonder if that sad memory is the one that made that time unforgettable. It is too sad to share, much less to say it out loud or give it life writing it down. We know. It is our secret.

      I love the little you in my mind. Through you I learned to accept others as they are. I do not want them to experience the same rejection you had to endure. I am glad it made the strong and careering woman that I am today. Thank you for enduring the pain, the sadness, and the trials you went through, little angel. You know, God was there with you! Do you remember Him talking to you through the wind and the movement of the leaves that day at the creek? It was Him; I know because he still talks to me the same way he did to you.

Stay here, in my memory. The journey will one day come to an end.  We will travel together and will never be apart again. All the sad memories will be vanished once and for all. We will enjoy a life that we could never dare to imagine when you were little. I stay in hope and through perseverance conquer most of all my insecurities. Some of them remain. It is okay. They keep me humble. I am happy with my kids and their offsprings. Life turned out better than you could imagine when we were little.

     Goodbye for now. I will write to you gain.

Are you a late bloomer?

“The most beautiful thing is that despite the shallow life we sometimes succumb to – the soul has no timeline and it knows what it wants and will yearn within until it seeks the journey”

― Malebo Sephodi

Last spring, my husband and I went to the hardware store and purchased two similar plants. He picked the one full of life, blooming to its capacity with lots of tiny blue flowers. Mine was smaller and blooming small pink flowers and had many buds, so far nothing out of the ordinary.  Except that this year mine was alive, his was dead. They were gone forever! How has it happened? They are perennial plants, after all.
It is amazing how we find an analogy in the simplest things of nature. Yesterday as I was washing my car yesterday and regretting it because the sun was intense, the empty garden pot reminded me of late bloomers.
According to the urban dictionary, late bloomers are people who experience a delayed heyday in their 20’s and or 30’s, when they finally have the factors (social and or job status, money, body, looks, etc.). You must love how the urban dictionary definitions.
Well, that rings a bell. Too close to home for me to like it, but I must accept it. I am a late bloomer. It was a summer in 1999 when I made the best career decision and the one that changed my life. It gave me social recognition and financial freedom. I was 36 years old when I started my 21-year career in Real Estate. Late bloomer was an understatement.
I had been busy raising my kids and worked in different jobs, but nothing of significance, although I have four years of college under my belt. I had a late start, but I made it count and, that is a win.
I was not fluent in English and, my friends were Spanish speaking. I could not find my way around the city. My patience was running low. What made the difference for me? I was determined and had the tools I needed at my disposition. Do not be afraid to use those tools as you venture out to a new interest. Those tools could be a supportive husband, a willing co-worker ready to teach you the ropes. The help of your mom looking after the kids. It can be anything. Remember to let them know how grateful you are.

Late bloomers have the advantage of experience, endurance, and desire to prove we can. I made sure never to fail a test, studying hard. I had something to prove to my peers and myself. Needless is to say that none of my peers are in Real Estate. Do not let little circumstances like language barriers or a limited sense of direction get in your way. People around you want to help you. They may be just a few, that is not important. What is crucial is that you are not alone. Many of us have done it and succeed at it.
Another example happened in 2016 when a friend invited me to a gathering. She was teaching acrylic painting. I was beyond myself; never would I have dreamed of learning how to paint. I started following artists on YouTube and made friends with some. They are part of those tools you need to grab ahold of it. They love teaching. You can support them as you learn. Lately, I started writing about my life with a writer friend. So far, I wrote two books. Did I tell you I am now in my late 50’s? Well, there you go. Late bloomers have no time to waste. We make our efforts count. Now I want to share my experiences and started this blog. How about all these accomplishments for a late bloomer?
I do not know where you are in life, but I want to encourage you to start. I used to say, “if you don’t start, you will n.” It is not deep, but I applied this principle to my life daily. At the time, it was about picking up debris from the yard or cutting the grass, but now, that phrase proved to be true in all the areas I am exploring. Even in the curiosity of why beautifully blooming plants die and those looking weak survive and thrive.

To Tell or Not to Tell

“If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to get far, go accompanied” African proverb.

Our society lives under the desire to acquire, to own, and to compete. For some time now, a new interest has developed. To share, exchange, and collaborate in various areas and ideas. Social media makes this latest fashion viable. This post is a great example.

Often, we question ourselves about the pros and cons of sharing our ideas, thoughts, desires, and interests. Remember that others have plowed the way to facilitate your success in a business interest or in any other endeavor you are pursuing. Some people may be afraid that in sharing ideas the opportunity to be recognized will be lost, but that is a long way from reality. The exchange of ideas and knowledge will lead you to discover the diverse options available to expand your ideas or interests. This variety of ideas are found in the reasoning of your collaborators. Everyone will bring their vision and personal experience which are unique.

Benefits of sharing your ideas:

  • Helps your idea to be developed.
  • Allows you the opportunity to give and receive knowledge.
  • Allows you the opportunity to connect with others.
  • Saves you time and effort.
  • Opens your mind to think outside the box.
  • Innovate and expand the concept.
  • The chance to bring your idea to fruition.

Your reasoning and strategies are based on the narrow margin of your personals experiences and the knowledge you gained with them. The same goes for professionals in various areas. No one has all the answers. Everyone can strategize as far as their knowledge. When the diversity of opinions and knowledge collides, they also multiply and expand. Sharing is the key to a broader vision, creation, and execution of your idea.

Things to take in consideration:

  1. Explain your idea clearly, using graphics and any other tools.
  2. Write your idea for clear visualization.
  3. Use all the tools available to make it easy for you to develop your project.
  4. Do not be discouraged by the ups and downs.
  5. Ask, research, and get ready. There is no worse question than the one you don’t ask; cliché, but very true.
  6. Surround yourself with people you trust. They must be ready, willing, and capable to help.
  7. Give yourself time to complete the desired results.
  8. Do not give up unless you have tried every possibility.
  9. Change, modify or let go of the idea if it is bringing negativity and financial hardship to your life.
  10. Start again with another idea if necessary.

The same happens with our emotions. It is equally true that humans feel the need to share. Hence the rise of the various platforms. In the cyber network, you find a diversity of opinions. Some of them can sound illogical and unbalanced, and that is fine. We based our views on our way of reasoning, experiences, and values. We desire to express ourselves. We also need attention. The need to tell our story is part of who we are. We don’t want to cry in solitude. Shared grief is much easier to bear, especially with friends who face life with positivism. It is not rewarding to be accomplished if you do not have someone special with whom you can share it. Has it ever happened to you? I hope not. The kids are very similar. They like to share their first run or bike ride without training wheels. Their first reaction is to celebrate with his peers and then with his parents. Yes, in that order usually.

In short, sharing costs nothing and. it can be of benefit for your life and your projects. When sharing ideas or personal life, be cautious. Do not let everyone in your close circle.  Keep your mind open to their opinions, and reserve the right to execute any project the way it is beneficial to you.

 When talking about your feelings and personal needs, remember:

  1. Some things should only be, shared, with the family. Not everyone will accept your flaws.
  2. Think about whether you can live if your confession becomes public. How will it affect your image?
  3. Ponder about the legal and financial consequences. Get an expert opinion on the matter.
  4. Do not send secrets in writing. You could send it to the wrong person.
  5. Share with the people that share with you as well. It is the biggest test of friendship.

Good luck in your new project, finding someone to share it with, and especially in safeguarding your most precious secrets.

“You are the master of the secrets you keep and a slave of what you share with others.” Sigmund Freud